O.K. I get it. Most grown-ups hate the teen phrase “du-uh” – a descending two-syllable exclamation to imply that someone has just stated the stunningly obvious. It drips with derision of the adult world and things adults take seriously. Well if adults don’t like the phrase, they need to stop saying such dumb things.

Take the issue of high achieving students looking at college. Contrary to what most adults working in the higher education marketing world want to believe, these high school students are not infatuated with your school, do not want to be your friend on Facebook and will not die if they don’t get in. Teens are much more sensible than that.

The large majority of high ability high school students looking at college know that there are many institutions at which they could be happy. They also know, given the competition, that they cannot bank on getting into any particular school. So they hedge their bets. They shop around until they find a list of acceptable alternatives, they apply and they wait to see how the cards fall out. They don’t fall head over heels for any one institution knowing that at the end of the day they may be frustrated. Besides, it’s not very sensible to fall head over heels in love with something as large and administrative as an academic institution. That’s not the way the world works. If they get into several comparable institutions, in most cases they will choose the one that is most highly ranked or where they get the best financial aid offer. Given the lack of reliable comparative information, that’s a sensible way for them to make a value-based decision.

These students do not spend hours reading your websites. They do not follow your student blogs. They do not sleep with your viewbook under their pillows. They do not have time for any of that. They are extremely busy high achieving students in their senior year of high school. When they visit your website, they go mainly for very specific information – like how to plan a visit or apply. They might browse your viewbook or the feature at the top of your website, but they do so once. That’s all they have time for.

Yes, there is a small group of students who don’t fit this mold – who obsess about your institution, follow the student blogs and pour over the viewbook. But this is a small group and they are usually not the highest achieving students. The large majority of students who end up at your institution and in many cases become life long devoted alumni start out with the mindset I describe. And it’s not one you can change or should want to change. They are approaching the process in a perfectly sensible way given their circumstances and the current structure of prestige U.S. higher education.

So what do they not want? They don’t want to hear that you’re the finest liberal arts college in the [your region here]. Or that you’re ranked top for [fill in the blank] by the Princeton Review. Or that you beat all competitors when it comes to community service, study abroad, undergraduate research, number of clubs, dining options or anything else. All they want is for you to BE. Be yourself. Let them know who you are. Let them experience you. They are smart enough to see through claims of distinctiveness. They know they are unreliable and probably not true.

Du-uh!